Steadiness In Uncertainty: Joy, Rest and Voice

We’re all dealing with unprecedented levels of uncertainty - global events, economic, and inside our organisational structures. Add in peri/menopause and the wild ride just got WILDer.

This topic comes up every day in my coaching work with clients.

I asked for help to research this article from my followers on Linked In, sharing these prompts:

➡️How are you experiencing this time of uncertainty - what’s it like for you? If you had 3 words to describe it, what's your 3 words?

➡️How are you staying steady in uncertainty. What’s helping? What's useful? Who’s supporting you?

➡️How are you supporting others to stay steady (team/ colleagues/ peers/ family) What's helping? What's useful?

The responses were FASCINATING (thankyou).

Summarised themes from the research:

*focus on what is good and what is working - create a daily practice around this

*reframe failures as learning - there is always a gift of insight or learning even in the toughest circumstances (you may not see it till later)

*focus on what really matters to you - family, health, love, friends - and make intentional time for these relationships and priorities

*see work in smaller blocks, and stay flexible with your long term plans

*take news and data in bitesized chunks to avoid overwhelm or being guided by misinformation - keep leaning on your own intuition

*accept that we can’t know what the future holds

*know that you’ve already navigated tough things and know you can back yourself whatever comes next

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So a couple of additional frames that I use in my client work to share with you:

Firstly, in my 1-1 coaching work, we create a personalised holistic wellbeing map, based on areas -physical, emotional, mental, locational, spiritual, relational - that deplete our battery energy, and areas that we can top up. We’re not gaslighting ourselves that the wider challenging context doesn’t exist and pretending that we’re not impacted by it, we’re focusing, for now, on what it is we can control and influence.

You can use this simple model to explore:

*where are you depleted?

*where are you topped up? And notice that this can ebb and flow throughout a day, and from day to day.

*which area needs a bit of TLC

Secondly, inside my community circle Resistance Rhythm co-hosted with Sukanya Nallaiah, we explore 3 themes to support us through times of uncertainty: Joy, Rest and Voice.

These are not framed as a ‘fix’ or a ‘solve’. They provide us with a foundational anchor. By centering joy, rest and voice we top up our battery, we sustain our energy, and we cumulatively build over time a strong foundation for our lives.

Joy, rest and voice don’t work in isolation. If we just focus on pursuing Joy by itself, we can tip into individualised empty bliss. If we just focus on Rest by itself, we can tip into disengagement, numbness or comfortable stagnation. If we focus on Voice by itself, we can tip into burnout.

That’s why in Resistance Rhythm we blend and weave all 3!

When I lean into joy, I am energised and tuned in to my own aliveness.

When I lean into rest, I am soft-hearted and open, I am replenished and my leadership and activism is sustainable.

When I lean into voice, I am clear, I am aligned, I feel courageous to act.

These 3 are like the roots of a tree - they go deep, they help the tree to move and sway with the wind, and withstand storms.

Community, connection and solidarity is also essential - it’s easier to navigate uncertainty, more fun and less heavy when we feel less alone, when we feel connected to others. Our quest for internal personal steadiness leads us to find and provide steadiness for others.

Let’s explore each of Joy, Rest and Voice how it helps us stay steady through uncertainty.

JOY:

Many of us are moving through heavy days and assuming joy should wait. Wait until the workload eases, or the news softens, and everyone else is okay.

But what if joy is not a betrayal of hard times? What if it’s part of how we stay human through them?

We can argue that joy is a biological necessity! Laughter is anti-inflammatory, crying is regulating, hugging is immuno-protective, singing and dancing regulate the nervous system, producing feel good hormones of serotonin, oxytocin and dopamine.

When I’m connected to joy I’m energised and tuned into my own aliveness. Whatever is happening in my outer circumstances, this inner presence can be peace, lightness, nourishment, fire.

I work with my clients to identify what gives them joy, create a joy list and then microdose that joy to counteract the ‘meh’ of every day. Learning how to spot opportunities for joy and juicing those opportunities when they are there.

Over to you:

What activities give you JOY? What is juicy and rich for you in life? Pick tiny specific moments or activities. Can you create a list of 5? Now choose 1 thing from your list that you will do TODAY. Schedule it in. Where is there some awe, some beauty, an exhale, a moment. Find it and juice it! Savour it, be fully in it.

Going Deeper with Joy:

Listen to my pod episode on Joy here join us for Resistance Rhythm HERE, read Uses of the Erotic, the Erotic as Power from Sister Outsider by Audre Lorde

REST:

We’ve been taught to keep going until we drop. To push through and call it ‘coping’, when really we’re running on fumes. To mistake collapse for rest, or numbing out for restoration. But they’re not the same. Real rest is not about numbing out, disengaging or disappearing from life. It’s about caring for your nervous system so you can stay in your life, with more steadiness, honesty, and capacity.

When we centre rest, we tune in to our energy battery and ‘top up’ intentionally where we may be feeling depleted. We notice energy ‘leaks’ and we plug the gaps. When we’re connected to rest, we’re taking the time to come back to ourselves, without guilt, shame or apology. When we lean into rest we become soft hearted and open, we’re replenished and our activism is sustainable.

Over to you:

Have a look at the holistic resilience map, and where do you need to top up your battery? What shifts when you give yourself permission to do that?

Going Deeper with Rest:

Listen to my pod episode on Rest here join us for Resistance Rhythm HERE, read Rest is Resistance by Tricia Hersey.

VOICE:

Centering our joy and our rest strengthens us to use our voice. So many of us think that ‘using our voice’ is something bold, public, and fearless. We think of ‘using our platform’ as posting on social media. Speaking up isn’t necessarily about being loud. But silence has a cost.

Voice can be noticing what feels off, or what harms or hurts others and calling it out, not walking on past or hoping someone else will raise it.

‘Speaking truth to power’ can sound scary, too big, perforative perhaps. But it can be as simple (and effective) as: starting up a conversation, asking a question, asking for clarification, sharing feedback about the impact of someone’s behaviour, sharing the data, inviting a senior colleague to consider an alternative.

And for many of us, that kind of honesty doesn’t come easily. We’ve learnt to keep the peace. To stay agreeable. To avoid being misunderstood. To keep ourselves small. But self-silencing has a cost. It can leave us disconnected from ourselves, resentful, unseen, and carrying words that never had a place to go.

For many of us, before we can use our voice externally with others, we’re wrestling with our own inner voice. The harsh and critical ways we speak to ourselves, can undermine our wellbeing and confidence every day.

When I’m prioritising my rest and centering joy, I’m more able to speak to myself with compassion, when I’m connected to my own compassion and inner wisdom, I feel more aligned and able to speak with clarity and honesty. Voice is about finding the courage to express what matters in ways that feel true to us. Voice doesn't have to be loud.

When we lean into voice we’re clear, we’re aligned, we’re speaking up with confidence and integrity. This is an essential aspect of helping us stay steady in times of uncertainty, disruption and transition.

Over to you:

Where are you editing yourself before you’ve even spoken? Where are you softening your words, questioning your instincts, staying small to keep the peace, or waiting til you feel confident enough?

What’s one way to express your voice safely and honestly in the week ahead.